sobering thoughts

I’m sitting on my sofa with a hangover to beat the band. My kidneys ache, my skin is in rag order and my head is pulsating.

I wasn’t in the pub last night, I wasn’t in a club. I was at dinner in boyfriend’s parents house. Genial hosts that they are, the evening included good food and lots and lots of wine.

We outstayed our welcome until 4 am. I can’t remember leaving, I can’t remember the taxi journey home and I can’t remember going to bed. I can’t even remember phoning four of my friends at 4. 40am but apparently I did and had to put up with their recriminations today.

I am ashamed and know this is not the behaviour of a mature together 31 year old.

I’m not actually a big drinker. I never drink during the week and I don’t go out that much at weekends. It’s my dislike of going out when I do go out which makes me drink. To enjoy sitting in a pub, which I find terribly boring, I do tend to go overboard and get drunk. I don’t like this, it scares me and I think of all the damage I am doing to my body.

Enough is enough, I have decided to stop, go cold turkey and what better way to do it than starting with the Christmas period.

Ah, Christmas. There are all the parties, dinners and even my birthday to get through and I know the next few weeks are probably going to be hellish. But I am game.

A sober Christmas, something I haven’t done since I was about fourteen. It’s going to be interesting.